But here’s the most revolutionary, evolutionary idea of all.  

In one swell foop, it capitalizes on many points presented here: 

• Job 1: Be less boring.
• News is not the answer.
• It’s time to empower the renegades on staff.
• Dare to brainstorm the blank page.
• Really find out what readers what.

In a single section, it’s possible to do all of the following:

• Create a perpetual innovation machine.
• Reverse the life-draining outflow of content to the Web.
• Get readers more involved than ever.
• Add candor, creativity, humor and surprise.
• Showcase content no other local media outlet can.

Look at what’s been thriving lately on the Web: MySpace. YouTube. Blogs. Forums. Places where million of people fulfill their need to have their time in the sun, their 15 zillion nanoseconds of fame. Newspapers have been remote, distant from their readers, who get a spotlight only in letters, ads, announcements, or some limited poem/drawing/photo page. 

Change that. Radically. The salvation of newspapers could lie not in feeding the Web but in stealing ideas from it.

Call this new section: The People Pages … The People’s Ex-Press … YourSpace …  The Youse Paper, as we might say in Philly. Or ByPopular Demand. Fill it with anything and everything that lets readers shine. The list of possibilities is long … and it better be to save a medium. 

The content? As marketing genius Abe Lincoln once said: This section would be “by the people, of the people, and for the people.”

It would be reader approved. Yes, polls and surveys, both in print and online would perpetually shape the content, forcing it to evolve.

There’s even a way it could be financially supported by readers. Smart business upsell their products. How about this “premium” subscription idea? For so much more a year, you get so many free announcements (anything from love notes for Valentine’s Day to birth announcements to death notices) or classified ads, or even just a box of reader shout-out space in our new YourSpace section.

Staff would be involved (there’s always a price), but mostly in selecting and shaping in ways that empower and gratify readers — or in creating graphics and briefs about ordinary folks.  Oh, and in making the section look good with photos and illustrations.

A sampling of the possible ideas:

• My Room … My Fridge … My Shopping Cart … My Gift Idea … (What I Bought and Why).
• Original reader one-liners, like the Atlanta Journal-Constitution’s “The Vent.”
• Original mini comics (graphic short stories, longer than panel cartoons).
• “Everybody’s a Critic.” A column with short opinions on anything. (See “Low-Brow Brigade” post.)
• Best of blogs, sports forums, YouTube, MySpace and FaceBook, with emphasis on local people.
• “Reality shows” that follow the lives of readers. (Do you own Bachelor, Biggest Loser or Apprentice.
• Talk of the Towns: Positive newsy notes about your neighbors. Or “My Friend. My Hero. My Neighbor” Testimonials.
• Contests / quiz shows in which readers compete.
• Provocative comments culled from stories on the Web.
• Results of all sorts of Internet polls.
• A Talk About TV forum (what’s with mostly doing reviews, which talk about shows before anyone else has seen them?).
• Poetry, fiction, plays … as long as it’s short and preferably illustrated.
• People’s pix .. best local pictures posted online … babies, pets, gardens, friends and family. 
• Letters to the editor off the beaten social-studies track.
• Jokes. Yes. Including visually humor PhotoShopped art.
• Classifieds, birth/wedding/death announcements, any other ads ads from regular readers.  

You’ll find more possibilities mentioned on other parts of this blog.

In short, craft a lot of your Website so it not only entertains people online, but generates content for this section. (Note: I have even better ideas for synergistic Web content I’m holding back to further develop.)

What’s the appeal? Online, visitors can be overwhelmed by all the choices.

This section will package it all in a handy, portable entertaining way. 

It should look nothing like a newspaper. Screw the columns. Screw the rectangular pictures. No strings of paragraphs. An inviting chaos of small art, little bold headlines and easy to read text blocks. Staffers who work on this should be short-form thinkers.

Make it mostly local. But make it partly national. Humor can be universal.

And share content with other papers. Help each other out.

Create an Associated Ex-Press … sharing print-worthy content from the Web.

To give newspapers new energy, life and hope.

The mission is to brainstorm ways to make papers as useful, newsy and entertaining as possible, with almost universal appeal. Impossible? Here’s an idea that for a single  feature that might manage to do all that.   

People mostly live in three worlds these days: Home. Work (or school). And car. So just think of all the high-interest subjects a dedicated Car Life Columnist might explore:

Traffic miseries and mysteries … Road conditions & construction news … Gas prices and mileage  … New gizmos and gadgets for commuters and families (from TVs for kids to navigational systems) … Car repair and maintenance … Beating traffic tickets … The confusing world of maps, directions and signs … Alternative fuels … The drive-through world (this year: The Drive-Through Nativity) … Health (stay awake!) and safety (teens, alcohol, drugs) … Regular and satellite radio  … Psychology (road rage, sexual politics of asking/giving directions, keeping kids amused) … Where to park …  the list is endless.

Who wouldn’t be interested in such a column? (OK, readers of a Mass Transit Columnist.) Car Life would lend itself to a team approach, too, switching to different writers who explore different routes, use different vehicles, drive at different times, etc.

Using cellphone-to-blog technology, such a columnist could even file live reports online. Bottom line: Readers would love us for making driving less of a pain in the ass!

How to Save 50 Bucks (At Least). Your daily reminder that “Hey, this paper is such a bargain!” Advice could be anything from bike maintenance to anger management to websites with free stuff.
Offbeat / Oddball News. Websites like fark.com and hits on philly.com and nbc10.com prove oddball news is extremely popular. Revive to liven up the A section. Include fun art.
Highlights and Lowlifes. A daily attitude-laced gossipy column about the private lives of sports stars. Have fun sidebar boxes like “Who Am I?” or “Who Said it?” or a trivia quiz. (At least, a weekly look back.)
Quips and Rips. A daily freewheeling Internet-style message board. Shares all sorts of anonymous reader remarks. Page 2 of features. A second one in sports?
To Your Health. Daily dose of practical news and advice.
Biz Quiz. Picture or multiple-choice quiz about mind-boggling business trivia.
Everybody’s a Comedian. Funny bits from late-night monologues, local comedians, staff guest-shots and amusing readers.
My Room … My Fridge … My Shopping Cart … My Handbag. Take your pick from these ideas for informative voyeurism. Satisfy curiosity about local notables, regular people and all sorts of recommended products.
Another Side of … Local notables talk about their lesser known sides, such as hobbies, charities, families, unknown parts of their histories. Or: 3 Questions. You ask celebs 5 questions and print only the 3 best.
Parallel Universes. An offbeat chart that compares coincidentally similar people or popular things. 
What’s Up With That? Regular short reaction piece to anything dubious in the culture. By different staffers every day. 
Games, polls and tests. The more readers get up and do something because of us, the more we’re a part of their lives. Go beyond puzzles and crosswords to social activities, like board games, group quizzes and tests, like the SAT Word of the Day, which preps college-bound kid while challenging the rest of us.
Reader Challenge. Or do a TV-style in-newspaper quiz show, We pick contests, run their pics & factoids, string out eliminations day by day to build suspense.

The needed newspaper revolution could learn from one on TV: Faltering ratings were boosted, temporarily at least, with the surge in reality TV. Basically, such shows were (a) cheap to produce, and (b) based on providing contrived vicarious thrills. How do real people behave? In a way, isn’t that one reason we read newspapers? To find out about ourselves? So why not (remember we’re talking the life or death of a business, a medium here) brainstorm ways to find out some of those answers using real people? Create a serial that runs every day, hooking readers to find out what comes next …

Help for the Helpless. Go to a halfway house or hospital and find people in need of a little support, a hand up. Tell their stories. Arrange sessions with experts. Chart progress. Appeal for help finding the people a job.

The Biggest Loser. There’s no reason a weight-loss group / contest can’t be a continuing saga.

Read Dating. Why not chronicle attempts by singles to meet a mate? Follow the tales of a small group as they try this service, these ads, this author’s advice, that online service.

The Apprentice. Again, why not a print version? A local business personality gets publicity in exchange for conducting an in-print talent search. With A-to-Z tips on finding jobs. Maybe run this in your Help Wanted section, to attract more attention to those ads.

Columnist for President. Sure, put your most lovable grassroots-stained wretch on the ballot. Then let him conduct the campaign in print. Offer equal time, of course, to the real candidates. Stupid? Subversive of the election process? Hey, maybe it would actually get people to pay attention to politics and even vote.

This is just a sample of the possibilities. In small towns where the local news is yawn-inducing and the national news has already been coopted by TV and CNN.com, sure could bring a little fun and life back to pulp.

Maybe coordinate this with a local TV news or radio talk show, boosting both parties on the Buzz Meter.

See what happens when you suspend focus on “news” and instead just think about what else can go on “paper”?